Looking Back

Monday, April 14
I've started this entry a dozen times over the past 10 minutes. Is this writer's block? Maybe I'm trying too hard to be poetic or something. I'm just going to glurb down random thoughts.

My calf cramped up about 50 yards from the finish line. It hurt so much that if it had happened at mile 5 or before I would more than likely not have finished. After finishing I was, however, miraculously still able to hobble over to the bagels.

Nearing the finish line I felt alone, even though there were thousands of others all around. It was me vs. the finish line. I won.

Upon crossing the finish line, that aloneness was broken by the sound of my children waving and cheering. What a welcome sight!

Volunteers are wonderful. Never before have so many people come together to help me out.

On the way toward the finish line, I saw the streetsweepers cleaning up the 10k route, just behind those who would be the final finishers. It was then that I realized how near the back of the pack that I was.

Pavement is designed to stop you. "Will" is designed to overcome pavement. That's the most important thing that our 10k training team developed...the will to finish.

We too often think that we are the only ones in a particular situation when there is a world of people going through similar experiences…and emotions, both easy and tough. Meet them and share experiences, emotions, and coping techniques. Listening, sharing, and supporting help all of us in our walks through life.

Success is built upon a series of small decisions. Small decisions over time can create extraordinary results.

It's not about being better than "them," it's about being a better me. Every one of us is different now. Fewer excuses, more enthusiasm. It's OK to be the last one across the finish line. At least we crossed it.

Dreamers are to be pitied, unless they create the unquenchable desire to turn dreams into reality.

"Stumbles" do not define your faith. Getting back up does.

Talk is only a beginning. At some point in time we have to roll up our shirtsleeves and get to work.

Rising above fears is based on decisions to become what we can be. Decide that the door to becoming what you can be is open.

Get permission to participate...your own permission. There comes a reckoning point at which, to pursue success, we must overcome fear and forego doubt. Give yourself permission to do something not just minimally worthwhile, but audaciously worthwhile. You are worth it. Then after committing to the decision, everything else is just details.

Find someone worth emulating, then follow their lead. Encourage others to follow. From followers will emerge new leaders.

Early on, I wondered if our coaches "had a life." They do, and they want US to have one also, a long and strong one; one in which we take on new challenges, and live assertively, energetically...motivated.

Consistency, while necessary, is not everything. After all, I've been pretty consistent about making excuses for not doing more.

Never listen to the devil guy perched on your left shoulder. How do I know that he's the one on your left shoulder? 'Cause the devil guy is never right.

We expect things to happen faster than they should. Training is laying a foundation for the next 5 years. If I stop building because of the pain, or because I see less results than I would like, or if I am looking only at this year's Monument Avenue 10k and not beyond, then the foundation goes for naught. If I keep building on it by seeking out more experiences, then the foundation will one day be supporting great success.

People are watching. What a wonderful feeling: your actions may furnish the strength that someone else needs. Who might be let down if I decide to skip a workout? Who will let my weakness determine their course of action (or inaction)? Who will get discouraged and begin looking to someone else as a positive example of what they would like to be? And, conversely, when I push through the rain or cold or lack of motivation, who will be even more determined to do the same? This journey is far more than a fun morning out. It's an obligation.

I am not spending time training...I am investing time. Negative thoughts create pain. Never hold a thought that weakens you. Create and hold strengthening thoughts. Create energy within. People "without a life" don't think and talk that way.

Quit quitting. Could it be that I'm beginning to think that exercise is...dare I say it...important?

Once experiencing the view of the other side of the mountain, so to speak, you will not be content with continuing to view only the first side. There are other mountains, even more beautiful to view, and mile markers even more meaningful.

So, there it is...my experience preparing for and participating in the 2008 Monument Avenue 10k.

'Bye. Gotta run...

16,376th

Sunday, April 6
16,376th place. Not too shabby for an old grandpa coming off of a 30-year hiatus. And I'm not near as sore and stiff as I anticipated. The 6-miler during training was tougher and the after-effects more pronounced and long-lasting. Now, 27 hours after the 10k, I feel almost normal. There is something to be said for conditioning. God blesses effort.

Later this week I want to sit for an hour or two, reflecting on my posts and summarizing my experience. I want to especially reflect on mile markers, those particularly meaningful (to me anyway) insights that I've experienced. One blessing that came about as an after-thought is that I raised almost $500 for cancer cure research. I guess the significance of that effort was obscured by focusing only on myself.

The most meaningful outcome of all of this has been that my children have shared my experience. After all is said and done, relationships are what life is all about. Their expressions of pride in my accomplishment have been heartwarming. It has also given me opportunities to tell my children that they are my inspiration to begin with. I would not have considered doing a 10k if it weren't for them. Each of them has demonstrated significant strength, determination, and persistence in the face of tough times. Each of them has stepped up to difficult situations and turned them into blessings. They have chosen to grow and be strengthened instead of beaten down. That's what this is all about.

Are there other similar events in my future? I don't know. One thing I do know is that I don't plan to go back to such a sedentary way of life. While we have no guarantees for our futures, we can set goals and move forward, and let God bless it as He sees fit.

After all, having goals helps wonderful things happen. Maybe next year I'll go for 13,000th place.

Showtime

Saturday, April 5, 7:30 a.m.
D-day. Ground Zero. Post time. Event day. Cloudy, wet, and a relatively warm 59 degrees. Great day for walking 6.2 miles. Even though it's a bit warm, the clouds and potential of rain will keep the temperatures from rising between now and 11:50, my anticipated finish time. I'm going for an ambitious 1 hour and 50 minute event time. 11 weeks ago I was figuring that it would take about 2:15-2:30 for me to complete the event distance. We will see...

Last night I set my alarm for 7:45 a.m., but my internal alarm woke me at 6:30. I managed to lay in bed for a few more minutes, but sleep was over, so I will be preping a little early. Channel 6 has live coverage of the Monument Avenue 10k from 8 to 10 this morning, and since I don't need to leave until around 8:45 for my wave start, and since I am up early I'll watch the coverage for an idea of what to expect when I get there.

I will pin my bib on my bright neon yellow shirt and figure out how to fasten my computerized timing chip onto my shoelace. I want to be official!

I really don't have the wild emotions that I thought I may have on race day. Maybe everthing hasn't sunk in yet. But then, emotions are crazy things. They can sneak up on you. Maybe they are sneaking up right now. One thing for sure, the little devil guy has been working overtime yesterday and today. Bad news--the devil guy doesn't quit. Good news--the devil guy no longer rules my life. While he may never go away, he is becoming far less influential.

The devil guy has been challenging me with negative thougths of freak injuries and a plethora of imaginary occurrences that I am sloughing off, thanks to the angel guy. In fact, yesterday and today the words of my Coaches Danny, "hog calling" John and their staffs of coaches are flooding my mind...Chuck Glover, you will finish, you have quit quitting, you are stronger than you've been in 30 years, you've made amazing gains...you are waaaay different now. Thanks coaches for the past 10 challenging weeks.

And thanks, God, for not giving up on me. It's You who sent to me my sons Jeremy and Stephen, who set the example of exercising and dedicated workouts, and Coaches Danny and "band camp" John. You will continue guiding me, encouraging me, compeling me...carrying me. You will neither leave me nor forsake me. You will deliver the greatest outcome, whatever that may be. Thanks, Father! Today is for you.

Time to prep. Uh, oh...I think those sneaky emotions may be about to pounce.

Saturday, April 5 at 5:32 p.m.
I made it.

Hardcore

Tuesday, April 1
I’m excited, and a bit anxious, about this coming Saturday. I woke up early this morning, around 5:45, and thought about forcing myself to stay in bed. I didn’t. The 10k has been on my mind a big part of today (it's about 10:15 p.m.). Starting tonight, I think that this 10k will have a bigger place in my prayers than before.

I wasn’t planning on writing another blog entry until after the 10k, but there are as many thoughts now, if not more, as before. Where will I park? What special message am I going to write on my bib? Will my shoe come untied? Will I see anyone I know? What time should I leave to get there? Will I make my goal of finishing in under 2 hours? How will I feel physically when I finish? How will I feel emotionally? What special reward am I going to give myself for my success that has nothing to do with food?

It has been said that one of life's most painful experiences is when we are presented an opportunity and are unprepared. Of the pain that I have experienced over the past 2 1/2 months of training, that's one pain I don't have to bear. I find a degree of peace in that thought.

According to the weather forecast, we may be participating in the rain. Maybe, finally, I will be "hardcore."